It's been a long day, you haven't had dinner yet and you still have to pack lunches for tomorrow, deal with Mt Foldmore and, if you're really lucky, watch last week's episode of Parks & Recreation. But before any of that happens you have to accomplish the impossible: getting the toddler to sleep. The Baby Sleep Company proudly presents the definitive list of 101 delay tactics toddlers pull at bedtime. Do you have one you can add?
You didn’t read the digger book
I need the hallway light on
With the door more open
You forgot to give me water
Not in the blue cup! In the Spiderman cup!
You forgot my dummies
I need three!
I want a star dummy
The blanket scratches my neck when you put it so high
I don’t want it covering my feet
The blanket is all foldy
My sheet has a crease
When is Jack going to bed too?
I don’t want to go to sleep wone-wy
I need my crocodile
And the mummy crocodile
And all the toys
I need one more cuddle
Not from you, from Daddy
Where is Grandma?
Is she awake?
When will we go to her house? *sob*
You didn’t give me any dessert!
I need to wee [doesn’t do a wee]
I need my nappy on
I just need to tell you one more thing [launches into very long and boring story]
The fan isn’t ON me
The fan is blowing my face
I need the fan off
I need one more kiss
Not from you, from Mummy
You need to lie with me
I want my favourite blanky
NO! My other favourite blanky!
You washed my blanky now it isn’t my favourite blanky anymore *sob*
You left your shoes in my room!
The shadows are scary
It’s too dark in here
The nightlight is too shiny
My bed is hot but my pillow is cold
My finger has a skin bit poking up
I need a bandaid
No! A Wiggles bandaid!
I’ve got a great idea for what we can do tomorrow
Can you and Daddy please be more quiet?
Jack won’t stop talking
Can you put my music on?
There is a monster in the heater vent
I can feel the buttons on my jammies when I lie here
My water is too cold now
I can’t get comfy
I’ll have a bad dream
You forgot to kiss me again
I was just playing QUIETLY
It’s not really my bedtime
I want to wait until you go to bed
Can I maybe sleep in your bed?
We forgot to brush my teeth! [we didn’t forget]
[Toddler appears in the living room like a night ninja] What were you guys laughing at?
Can I play with your phone?
Can you take a photo of me?
Can I take a photo of you?
Can I watch a movie on the puter?
I want to say goodnight to the dog
I can’t find my shoes
I have to get my kindy bag ready
Jack is breathing too loud
The wind is too noisy
I can’t find my dummies
It’s not late
I need to do a poo [no poo is produced]
[Toddler shuts eyes for 10 seconds] I had a bad dream
I had a scary thought
My [body part] hurts
I need my Woolworths dominoes in bed with me
My music stopped
I want different music now – the beautiful music
The other beautiful music
It’s too soft, I can’t hear it!
You didn’t sing Twinkle Twinkle yet
My cup is empty
I need another drink
My button came undone
I am doing cough-ez
I need medicine
I’m too awake to go to sleep
My belly hurts
I’m going to bom-it
I need to wee [produces world's tiniest wee]
My hair is itchy
Jack is snoring
The shadows outside are moving
Oh! I thought it was morning!
What will I have for breakfast?
My dummies all dropped out of my bed
I heard the baby wake up!
I can hear daddy snoring
If you can think of anything we've missed PLEASE let us know on our Facebook page!
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If you would like personalised help with any sleep issue for a child, newborn to 5 years, contact The Baby Sleep Company today on 0457 473 725 or click here to send us an email.